Wednesday, February 13, 2008


There are ants in the kitchen. My dear Greg commenced battle against them before I got home from work, but some still linger.

I'm not usually squirmy over bugs, but ants really bother me. I think it goes back to Winter 1986, growing up in Northern California. That year there was a lot of rain. The ground was saturated. Wind-blown rain was actually leaching through the walls of my bedroom. One of my bedroom windows didn't close properly, and sometimes I'd wake up soaked from the rain. Nothing wanted to be outside in that weather, including ants. I can still see them on my walls, on my floorboards, my bookcase... everywhere. The only time a bug ever lasted more than a millisecond in my mother's impeccably clean house were those ants, that winter.

I feel like they're crawling all over me, damn them. Hate ants.


David Moles said...

What does your rental agreement say about pet aardvarks?

Jon Hansen said...

We had that happen a couple years ago. It was late, it had been raining a lot, and I went into the kitchen to turn off a light -- and lo and behold, the entire damn wall was covered with them. Had to take 'em out with the wet/dry vac.


Pat. said...

My wife and I have wildly differing reactions to ant attacks. She will grab a can of Raid within seconds of spying an ant trail and SPRAY SPRAY SPRAY til the whole house smells.

I on the other hand take a moment when I see the trail. I freeze. I turn around slowly like I'm in a zombie movie... looking for more trails. I look under my feet; I look at the ceiling; I look at the fridge, at the dining table, at the back door. Then I go change clothes. I get the 409 and a roll of paper towels. And I go to work removing and cleaning off everything that I might want to eat off of that was out in the open. Then I address the ants.. again, with nothing but 409. I remove every single trace of their trail scent and then I fill up the hold they came in with caulk or whatever.

I'm a cleaner. I'm like the Harvey Keitel of ant killers.

And I hate the smell of Raid.

Dr. Lisa said...

Greg successfully battled the ants and I can go into the kitchen without wanting to burst into tears. Thanks for the support!